little women

you see, i'm not frightened of mccain being president. i'm frightened he might die and leave her in charge.

lost without you

the new york stock exchange is opened every day with far more pomp and circumstance than necessary. today it was opened by delta goodrem in honour of her new album. (?!)

on the website it suggests that you can watch "Watch a live webcast of The Opening Bell at 9:29 a.m. ET on October 14, 2008. The archive will be available shortly after the event."

so, i'm not sure what they mean by 'live.'

little drummer boy

hit it

ripping yarns

yep, i'm starting another anti-sarah palin campaign to add to the tens of thousands out there.

luckily, they all provide me with a wealth of source material that in turn has been supplied by the (slightly retarded) hockey mom, herself.

blowing in the wind

i like a woman who can take her underwear off in public.

riding in cars with boys

paris hilton is accompanied by one of the best actors and coolest men alive, and she is still shit.

oh martin, i hope you got paid.

an american president

i've been a staunch defender of obama in the last few months. mainly, my basis has been on the fact that he's a democrat and so was josiah bartlett (the greatest president ever). the west wing TV series has a big influence on my knowledge of the american political system, i make no apologies as it was well informed, deeply researched and filled with advocated devil arguments.

i'm rewatching the entire of west wing again as my girlfriend hasn't seen it before, so i won't go into any detail... but writer Aaron Sorkin based jimmy smits' character on barack obama way back in 2001 so if that's not a sign of intelligent writing i don't know what is.


anyway, i watched the presidential debate a couple of days ago. i felt as a member of the human race who is vastly affected by the choice of american president in the self-dubbed "greatest nation on earth;" that i should at least watch the two most likely candidates cat-fight it out for an hour or so.

the results were pretty disappointing.

i viewed the debate with as little bias as possible, giving mccain the benefit of any republican-based doubts. i was well aware that obama isn't actually matt santos but a human being without a preordained, scripted life story. i was fully prepared for the blind patriotism that you always get whenever american's talk about anything, absolutely anything. they both had a fair shot. they both missed.

i liked them both, as people. but i am in no way excited about either of them becoming the "leader of the free world" - (that title always makes me laugh and shake my head.) i'm not naive, i know that they would have both had endless sessions with their political advisors and script writers and strategists and sam seabournes and josh lymans and bruno gianellis, and they would have been given key words to repeat over and over. john mccain's most obvious were 'economy' and referring to the audience as his 'friends.' although its amazing how little i managed to understand what mccain was talking about half the time. more often than not, his answers were a rambling mash of tangents and bewilderment, usually followed by some slightly inaccurate questioning of obama's political record.

i remained unconvinced.

i hoped to be more enthralled by barack. his commanding presence during his speeches and his focus on middle-class issues have warmed me up 'til now. i get a good vibe from him. he is young and energetic and a step forward for america. but he does lack experience, and it shows, particularly in matters to do with military presence around the world. hopefully he will be able to fill in the gaps very quickly between now and when it might be important.

watching this debate brought me - begrudgingly - back home to british politics. firstly, wondering about the possibilities of creating this united states style celebrity atmosphere around our top politicians. my theory is the following: politicians would have to work harder. this can only be better in terms of policy, behaviour and personality.

secondly, we really don't have any worthy choices to lead our country. we are faced with the three most likely
gordon brown - useless, bumbling idiot with no personality who is yet to actually be elected into his position; and appears to have propelled our country into economical disaster.
david cameron - whiny posh-boy who seems to think that politics is only about belittling the opposition and not about making the country better.
nick clegg - wha'... who? oh, him. well he can promise anything can't he, because he'll never be in power and won't have to hold true on any of them.

so it's slowly becoming evident that the world has no good candidates.
great britain? no.
USA? no.
russia? holy shit no.
china? oh lord.
africa?..... i'll get back to you.
korea, cuba, iraq, south america, afghanistan, canary wharf?.... oh dear.

"vote Obama!
in the absence of Jed Bartlett, he's the best we've got."

watch the entire debate if you like:

dumb & dumberer

we're fucked

clerks II

this is based on a true story

easy rider

porn you can watch with your mum. that's what we all want.

bo selecta

this chap is called bo burnham. he made me laugh twice today.

mr. big stuff

the devil wears prada

american psycho

justified

maybe with the negative responses to my range of media tramps i should seek to justify them a bit more. i guess they are on a line between satire and art, but as i'm more of visualist than a political spokesman i'll forcibly nestle them in the world of activist art.

activism has been expressed through art for a pretty long time and - good or bad - it comes from the artist's need to express a dissatisfaction with the world as it is. politics, pop culture, conformation, capitalism, colonialism and anything you care to list has probably been satirised or commented upon in some form of activist artwork, and this is all i'm doing. whether you think it's offensive or ill-informed or just plain 'bad' that's fine; but i'm regularly and consistently angered by the way that certain roots of the media choose to celebrate and reward mediocrity. for some reason the likes of paris hilton and jordan - who don't appear to contribute anything positive to our society - are praised, empowered and rewarded for such lack of action.

paris hilton is paid up to $100,000 to turn up to a party. a hard day's work i'm sure.

jordan promotes the idea of a bad body image in a lot of teenage girls.

amy winehouse has had more publicity through news coverage this year than anyone else, largely because of a widely advertised drug addiction. earlier this year, winehouse was voted (by teenagers) to be the best role model in the country, without any redemption. if that's not a concern, what is?

kate moss is considered a role model for children, showing them that as long as you are physically attractive you can be paid a lot of money for disgracing yourself.

simon cowell is just arrogant and doesn't get pulled up on it enough because he gave us westlife and robson & jerome. twat.

lily allen's one is just a review of her music really. you could read similar reviews in any issue of NME magazine.

the american judicial system has ruled britney spears to be a bad mother. whether she loves her kids or not, i can't find evidence to argue with them.

steve jones is famously rumoured to have slept with mariah carey and as one man to another i feel i should at the very least take the piss out of him for it.

i am genuinely frightened of the potential reality of sarah palin becoming president. this particular one was inspired by matt damon's comments last week.


these are all pretty concise, and i'd probably find great self-destructive pleasure in ranting at length about each of these people in turn. i thought it would suffice to do the pictures instead.

i suppose you could argue that these people are unfair game, have personal psychological troubles and it's not their fault that cheap-ass tabloids focus on them and put pictures of their abuse on the front page. if you were totally naive.

you should all note that i didn't have to look past the first google-results page for any of the links used in this post.

peaceful the world lays me down

a lovely little song from a lovely little band.
Noah and the Whale - 2 Bodies 1 Heart

what's eating gilbert grape?

xXx

baise moi

i've done a few of these media tramp pictures now and there are more to come. some people have taken offense to them, i just thought they were funny. offensive is funny. satire, eh? some like it hot, some don't.

i don't mean any personal offense, just having a bit of a rant about the way popular-media celebrates mediocrity. i find it offensive that this lot suck up my TV time. i pay good money for my license, you know.

that's better.

white christmas