anyway; it was another weekend in the land of brum including the energetic troubadour, this time accompanied by his delectable serving wench - the lovely laura anne felicity simpson. the focus of this weekend was basically to attend a burlesque night in a long flat dimly lit venue in the gay area of birmingham. what a real good treat, mmm.dressed up we did and spent the evening witnessing a frickin' awesome band, an absolutely delightful singer by the name of imelda may, and of course a multitude of lovely ladies removing their clothing. certainly not something to be scoffed at, i can tell you.
i absolutely must mention the final act of burlesque before the furniture was swept aside and we collapsed into a selection of fancy-dressed jive dancers. (i use the term jive dancer very loosely for myself, of course. the current crippledom prevents anything more than a sort of achy-looking jerky body-pop crossed with what your hunchbacked nan looks like on news years eve.)
the evening culminated with - pretty much the weirdest act i've ever seen - a guy dressed as a mad victorian surgeon, speaking only in rhyme and running 50,000 volts of electricity through his girlfiend so as to light a flare off her silvery pierced nipple. yep. this of course was only one of many eye-opening tricks involved with the electrical generator pushed sheepishly onto stage. the most memorable, and perhaps most weird, was the finale: with clenched teeth the doctor pumped electricity through a conductor (kids, don't try this at home) positioned up his quivering arse. including himself in the circuit he lit a flourescant tube, a bathroom light wrapped round his head and proceeded to light a candleabra with his tongue.
maybe i should've attached a warning for my younger readers.
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