"hi, i'm megan fox and i'm employed by the big studios to sell films that might not make any money otherwise. i mean, transformers 2 was pretty much only marketed by a shot of me writhing around on top of a motorbike like some sort of nuts magazine model.
and did you see how to lose friends and alienate people?.. that was totally rubbish, but the advert starred me in a wet cocktail dress.
and i was in a film simply known as whore.
and i'm currently making one called fathom where i play a "half-naked mermaid" - or so the press release says.
and all i talk about in interviews is that i like kissing girls, and pandering to various other 15 year old boy fantasies, setting them all wanking like a wet piston.
anyway, i'm quite irritating, but i'm thin and more than happy to act like i'll suck your cock; so you'll probably fancy me and go and see this movie. even though it looks shit."
- megan fox