Wednesday, 5 August 2009

puppy love

look at this:

i saw this medical health poster recently. my first thought was that you could replace the picture on it with a photo of katie price and completely change the message, whilst remaining based on truth.

i kinda think the word "stroke" is totally inappropriate for something so damaging. i like stroking. and having a stroke.

and while we're on the subject, did you see the advert that accompanied this poster?:

i always thought the words they chose to be just a little bit too tenuous. supposedly we're to think "FACE ARM SPEECH TIME" if we're worried if someone nearby is having one.
even if we could recall those completely random words, i'm not entirely sure we'd know what they meant. especially the time one, that could mean anything.
anything except "pick up a telephone and dial the emergency services and ask for an ambulance."

you might as well think:
FISH: are they able to eat a fish?
ARSE: are they able to get up off it?
SPECTACLES: if they have them, are they kind of vibrating or falling off or anything?
TIME: what is the time?

when i was informed that my grandparents' dog died from a stroke, i wondered whether my grandma had just been a bit heavy-handed and broken it's back.
believe me, just writing that joke makes me feel as bad as you did for laughing. okay you probably didn't laugh, did you?
did you at least smirk?
alright then, i'm just a bad person. i mean i did just write a blog about the comedy derived from a crippling health attack.

speaking of droopy faces and slurred speech, i did this to help your imaginations:

god, i need a censor.

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